geoffrey gauchet

Forget Drew Brees

So the Saints’ OTAs are coming to a close and Drew Brees hasn’t been a part of them at all since he still doesn’t have a contract. People are getting nervous about that. Some people think that Drew’s just waiting on stuff happening with the NFLPA before he signs. Drew’s agent is arguing that he should get something comparable to Peyton Manning’s, and the Saints are countering and saying Tom Brady’s contract is something blah blah blah.

Frankly, I’m over it.

I’m a big fan of Drew’s. Aside from being a record-breaking athlete, he’s a pretty cool dude who just happens to own a sandwich shop. But, I’m past the point of caring whether he gets his contract that he wants. I mean, it’s just football, anyway. There’s bigger issues here to worry about. But even in the microcosm of football, I still don’t care.

I like watching the Saints play because they’re my home team and they’re good. Drew Brees is good, but the rest of the team is good too. Last I checked, Drew Brees didn’t make that interception in the Super Bowl (okay — bad example now that Porter’s gone). Drew Brees didn’t block the Falcon’s field goal in 2006. (Ok, still a bad example). My point is, the Saints have made some amazing plays where Drew was on the sidelines. Sure, that’s defense and whatever but my point still stands — the coaches and other players are great. 

Giving Drew this whole “Breesus” status (which, in such a hardcore Catholic city, seems odd) elevates him to Lebron James status of basically saying “I AM THE WHOLE TEAM LOOK AT ME I AM ALL SAINTS”. Sure, Drew doesn’t act like a giant d-bag or anything (can’t ever picture Lebron on the Ellen Show), but this whole contract negotiation does have an ever-so-slight “The Decision” tinge to it.

Whoa. King James/Bible, Breesus/Jesus.

I don’t want to take anything away from the guy, but whatever, he plays football. And stars in a bunch of commercials. And owns a couple of sandwich shops. Yes, the Saints from 2006 to present have made us happy and forget the Katrina nonsense of yesteryear, but it’s important to remember that the Saints have done that — not just Drew.

I feel as tough it’s time to stop hoping and wishing. Do I want Drew to get  along term deal with the Saints? Of course! Am I going to worry about it? Not anymore. 

No, it is now time to rally behind Chase Daniel. Chase deserves his spot in the limeli— what’s that? He broke his what?

Well, at any rate, I”m rooting for Chase Daniel this season. If Drew Brees can accomplish what he’s accomplished coming off of a busted shoulder, Chase Daniel can at least complete some passes coming off of a broken thumb.

I feel like Chase is that kid in every sports movie that’s all like “Put me in, Coach! I can do it! Just give me the chance!” and Sean’s just like “Not yet, kid. Yer not ready!” and then during the last game of the regular season when the Saints are up by 21 points, Sean turns to Chase and says “Daniel! Get in there!” and Chase smiles slowly as he puts on his helmet and then jogs out onto the field, where the team gets into the Victory Formation and Chase Daniel has his beautiful moment where he takes a knee.

Well, I say, enough is enough! Let’s make Chase Daniel a celebrity. Let’s give him that chance. He’s probably a pretty cool guy. I’d bet he’s pretty good at like Contra. I’d play Contra with Chase Daniel. Chase Daniel doesn’t even need to put in the Konami Code. He’s just that good. (Also, he doesn’t know the Konami Code)

We see Drew in all sorts of commercials (his Twitter feed is essentially nothing but #sponsored tweets these days). Hell, even his wife and kids are in commercials. Nyquil, Walgreens, Chase Ba — whoa whoa whoa!

Drew Brees is in a Chase commercial. If any quarterback for the Saints should be in a Chase commercial, it should be Chase Daniel! I have a feeling this conversation happened in the Saints locker room.

Chase: “Hey, Drew. What’s up? Filming any new commercials?” ::awkward laugh::

Drew: “Oh, no, nothing major. Just, you know… the usual.”

Chase: “Oh, that’s cool.”

Then during the Super Bowl, Chase sees Drew’s Chase commercial. As soon as they say “Chase” in the commercial, Drew breaks the fourth wall, looking directly at Chase Daniel and winks, as if to say “Hey, Chase — suck it.”

As the commercial ends with their slogan “Chase what matters”, Chase Daniel erupts in anger, flipping his coffee table and spilling Funyons on the floor, and yells “CHASE IS WHAT MATTERS! I AM WHAT MATTERS! NOT DREW WHAT MATTERS! CHASE WHAT MATTERS! ‘DREW’ IS PAST TENSE! ‘CHASE’ IS PRESENT TENSE!” and then he sits on the now-beer-soiled couch and places his head in his hands and begins sobbing.

After reading that entirely fabricated story, is Drew Brees the type of guy you want as the star of your team?

Drew Brees doesn’t matter. Chase what matters.


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