geoffrey gauchet

Merry (?) Christmas

Well, we made it past "Thanks"giving. Wow. Now here comes Commercialmas! Yes, it's that time of year again! Time to rush to Toys 'Я' Us and find the Tickle-Me Elmo of 2000. Let's all forget who's birth we're celebrating and worry about what cookies to leave out for Santa and what to buy Uncle Bill, the drunken mailman. Speaking of Santa, all of our lives our parents tell us not to lie. Now, if I remember correctly, for, roughly, 10 years my parents kept the "tradition" of Santa, The Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny alive. These things are ficticious, am I wrong? So by telling me for TEN YEARS that these 3 "people" exist, weren't they telling me a bigger, more emotionally scarring lie than my lie to the question "Who broke the lamp?" Hypocracy at it's finest. Back to the commercial aspect of the holiday…
Jesus Christ, Son of God, Creator, Messiah, love, peace, joy, Macy*s, 50% off, toys, money, VCRs, surroundsound stereos, CDs, cars, bikes, ah, the many aspects of Christmas. Oh, and lets rerun the "Full House" Christmas special where they get stranded at the airport and have to celebrate the holiday there 73 times, right after the 24-hour marathon of "It's a Wonderful Life." Fuck you, Chaunuka! Fuck you, Kwanza! Fuck you, pagan rituals! Yeah, let's focus on the Catholic holiday and capitalize on it. Yeah! That's the ticket! I mean, it's not like the other religions matter. Just the one that will bring in the most cash. Of course! The one religion that has persecuted so many other religions, Catholocism! What? The holiday is to remind us of the birth of Christ, the savior? Nahhh… it's got to be about "Grinch" movies and "Rudolph" specials; candy canes and stockings; turkeys and wine. Fuck you, homeless people! Fuck you, Jesus! We want our capitalist America, not some meaningful holiday!

Prying Open My Third Eye »
March 2, 2004
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